I’ve been waiting to see this again for years. Not just because it’s a great episode—which it is (this would probably be one of my favorite episodes no matter what). But in this case I was especially waiting to see Linda, or rather the actress who played Linda. She’s a friend of mine and a former member of my theatre company. We acted together in two plays in 2002 and I worked behind the scenes on a couple more that she was in. When she joined our ensemble and it came out she’d been a child actor, I was captivated by her Wonder Years appearance. All else was dross, even her Adventures in Babysitting role (which many people recall fondly but I’ve never seen).
She’s a wonderful performer and it comes across in this role. In all honesty, the quality of the acting from young thespians throughout the entire series is uneven. But we forgive that because the circumstances ring so true and sometimes the awkwardness works considering its Jr. High. But she definitely stands out in this one as that person you like, but don’t LIKE-like (she also stands out for being shorter than Kevin, no mean feat). Everyone has been on that one-way street with a friend who wants to be more while we’d like to keep on trucking. And most of us have been on the other side as well, hoping in vain that something develops with someone who’s just not having it. Linda plays it perfectly. She’s helpful with Kevin’s pursuit of Southern Belle Lisa Fisher. She’s complimentary of Kevin, but not fawning. She makes it clear that while other offers are on the table, she’d prefer Kevin. But as Skye Masterson sings, “Mine I leave to chance and chemistry.” I’ve been there, we’ve all been there. She’s a great girl, perfect in almost every way, but you’re just not attracted to her. Even though she’s attractive. What can you do?
It’s a situation that still makes me uncomfortable today, and at times watching this episode I got a little anxious. I never know what to do with people who want something like this that I can’t give them and my inclination is usually to try and nip it in the bud, which often comes across as somewhat assholish. But I guess I’d rather be a dick like that that be a dick by feeling I was leading someone on. Clearly there is a third way here and I just need to work not being a dick at all in these situations. Further proof that I, like everyone else, am a work in progress.
In addition to the slight anxiety, I was also a little frustrated with Kevin because five or six years ago I had a crush on the same girl (all growed up of course) that went no where (the destination most of my crushes share) and the Linda in this episode is a lot like the girl is in real life: funny, smart, down to earth, easy to talk to, and cleans up real good. Kind of ideal. This as opposed to the Lisa Fisher trophy girl you can’t stop thinking about but have nothing to say to when she’s standing right in front of you. If women like bad boys who treat them poorly, men always get hung up on pretty girls they’ve got nothing in common with. Hey Nineteen, anyone?
“The Powers that Be” is the first time we meet Jack Arnold’s dad. They don’t get along. There’s a bunch of fights and a big one near the end. Kevin loves them both and he’s confused and angry.
One other thing that struck me here is that I’d forgotten how long the series kept doing those 16mm cut scenes with Jack and Norma looking basically the same but little kids playing Kevin, Wayne, and Karen. In my memory that was a device that had been abandoned early on, but here we are halfway through the 3rd season and here’s another one of grandpa, mom, and dad opening presents with the tykes.
My guess is that I sort of forgot about them because they mainly show up in family-centered episodes, and to my adolescent self the episodes that meant to most were the ones with The Girls. These family episodes just didn’t interest me as much and I vaguely remember thinking they were filler between the good episodes with Winnie or whichever girl was distracting Kevin and making him feel excited and nervous they way I was feeling excited and nervous about girls. And still do most of the time.
But this time around with the series I’m seeing these family episodes in a different light entirely. I don’t have a family of my own yet, but I’m older now (and I’d like to think at least a little wiser), and I feel these stories much more deeply than I did 20 years ago. I think that’s because it’s a matter immediacy versus perspective. The Girl episodes take us that time in life when romantic feelings are new and feel like life or death in a way they generally never do again. But the Family episodes speak to themes that require time and reflection to fully understand.
When it comes to The Girls, young Kevin knows exactly what he’s feeling most of the time. The Older Kevin is generally there to comment humorously (often at his younger self’s expense) and extract a lesson. But in the family episodes Older Kevin provides understanding that Younger Kevin just didn’t have, and won’t for awhile yet. Instead he’s usually a little lost and he doesn’t see or necessarily understand what’s really going on between the grown-ups. He’s caught up in the strong emotional currents and he feels them intensely, but he can’t pull himself free of these strong psychological tides and look at them with any kind of objectivity or intellectual understanding. Almost no one can when you’re that young still right in the middle of it all. It takes years (and for some people mucho therapy) to start looking at it from the outside.
Many people never really escape those currents and consistently revert to the patterns of their childhood with their parents or siblings or anyone else who strikes similar relationship chords. And even when you do have some awareness, those old patterns can be comfortable as an old sweater, even if they’re about as healthy as the fried chicken families used to eat every Sunday at supper. That’s why nostalgia (which The Wonder Years is built on) can be both seductive and dangerous: it is a constant struggle to live like an adult, and it is a challenge for anyone who bothers to take backward glances to respect and honor the past without being beholden to it.
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